Fear All Things
by Rellik-chan
Summary: Karin never cries, because she's tougher than that. She needs to be that way for her sister. Will she be so tough after meeting her inner self, though?  Not too sure of any pairings at thing point, I'll just wing it
1. The Fear

AN:

A key:

**bold: **The voice only Karin can hear

_**bold and italic: **_Karin's dreams/anything not happening in "reality"

Normal: her average thoughts and actions

Do you people think I really own Bleach? Really? Well thanks, but... Sadly, I don't! All things Bleach belong to the wonderful Tite Kubo

* * *

_**Another night of utter darkness, and yet the sheer brightness is blinding. It has always been a very confusing place to be... I feel as if my senses had gotten used to it, though. It is, after all, my dream right? If I can't get used to it there is no point in sleeping at all.**_

_**The bright darkness surrounds me, I feel many sensations at once; warm, cold, pain, heartache, and apathy. I feel it all, and more, but there is one sensation that screams the loudest as the voice breaks the deafening silence. **_

_**Fear.**_

"**When shall you see me, Karin-chan...?"**

_**The fear... It's all becoming too much! I can't handle this! **_

_**I'm going to break...**_

* * *

"Breakfast is ready, Karin-chan." Came Yuzu's voice; not her usual, "too-bubbly" voice, but the more empty one she's had since Ichigo returned.

A little over seventeen months... He was gone all that time, and he returns just like his old self. Except, he can't see spirits anymore. He isn't a shinigami. He feels like he can't protect us anymore, but what he doesn't realize is... I don't need protecting. I can take over for him. I'm a big girl now; I know all of this spitit junk isn't as plain and simple as I thought it was. There are things I don't know, and sure as heck things I never want to learn, but... With Ichigo out of commission, and dad taking more and more "business trips", I need to be strong. For my sister, and for Ichigo.

"I'm on my way down now, Yuzu-chan..." I sigh, and stand up.

A sudden chill, then the sun shines bright into my room. Why does this all feel so... Familiar, and yet so new? It's just a plain old spring morning, nothing to get worked about. Everything for me has been so complicated since Ichigo left, but it feels like now that he's back... I'm going to have so much more on my plate. I really don't mind taking care of things. If it's to keep my sister safe, I'll do anything.

"**Anything...?"**

Where did that voice come from...?

"**Kurosaki-chaaaaan, just open your eyes! That's all you need to do!"**

What is this feeling...? I'm so cold, but I'm sweating. I feel alone, yet claustrophobic as if in a vast crown of people. I am... Afraid.

"Karin...!" Yuzu screams, "Dad! Dad, Karin's passed out...!"


	2. The Desperation

AN:

A key:

**bold: **The voice only Karin can hear

_**bold and italic: **_Karin's dreams/anything not happening in "reality"

Normal: her average thoughts and actions

I will post a list of translations at the end of the chapter. I used Google Translate, so some things might be wrong... But it's close enough for me~

Still, I do not own Bleach. You can thank the amazing Tite Kubo for this great manga~

* * *

_**The voice... I can't place it, but it sounds familiar. As if I heard it once when I was very young, and now it's back. I can't put a face to the it, and I can't find the direction it's coming from.**_

**"Kiyuu."**

_**What...?**_

"**This is blind fear, Kurosaki-chan. Worthless; just open your eyes!"**

* * *

"Y-Yuzu! She's waking up!" Yells Pinta.

Why are they here...? All four of them, seeing me like this... I risk a glance around the room, not knowing if I had truly awoken from that nightmarish dream.

"Get out," I force out, "All of you... Just get out."

**"****Yowai." **

The voice was right this time. Pushing them away... That was weak of me. They all showed concerned looks; I know they care, even if they are all complete idiots sometimes. They're my idiots. Aside from my sister, these guys have been my world for years. Pinta, Donny, Usaka, and Ryohe... They could never let me down.

"Guys, I'm fine." I said, forcing myself up from the bed, "I just needed a break, you know? A day to just rest."

As if they were doing so by script, all of them looked down at the ground.

"Karin..." Yuzu whispers, as she walks into the room, "You've been out for three days."

My eyes went wide and I glanced around the room, seeing Ichigo seated by the door. He was staring at me as if he wanted to ask me something, then looked down. Good; I wouldn't give him a straight answer anyway. This is all my burden to bare. He needs to live a normal life, now.

* * *

"What kind of idiot would come knocking at this hour...?" I heard Jinta mutter from behind the door.

Obviously, I had woken him up.

"Welcome to Urahara Shop, we're closed. Please come back when-" He finally took the time to open his eyes, "Karin-chan..."

A slight breeze blew past us. There was a look of recognition in Jinta's eyes. Of course, I know where he last saw it. The look I have in my eyes now... I would bet anything that it's pretty close to how Ichigo looked every time he came for help. Desperate for advice, utter confusion about how to move on.

"Jinta... I need to speak with Urahara."

* * *

Translations:

**"Kiyuu****" = fear **

**"Yowai" = Weak**

Thanks so much to fanficssuck for correcting a translation error :3


	3. The Time Limit

AN:

A key:

**bold: **The voice only Karin can hear

_**bold and italic: **_Karin's dreams/anything not happening in "reality"

Normal: her average thoughts and actions

Nope, don't own bleach. Tite Kubo does, though~

* * *

"Do you need something stronger to repel Hollows?" Urahara yawned, as he took a spot at the table across from me, "Couldn't this have waited? It's only 6:00 in the morning..."

"I'm afraid it-" I began, but was soon cut off by the sound of a gentle, quiet knock on the door.

Ururu, definitely; no way Jinta would interrupt us. Tessai would kill him.

"Tea..." She spoke quietly, setting the tray down and leaving to give us our privacy.

"As I was saying," I began again, "I do not believe this can wait... I..."

He sipped at his tea and listened patiently; it's strange, when I first began meeting with Urahaha, I was sure he was a hoax. I didn't expect him to be such a wonderful person; not to say that running a candy store is anything to be super excited about. He's actually a good guy, no matter how shady he looks.

"I've been hearing things lately... And there are," I pause before continuing, opting to sip at my tea to make myself seem more calm than I really am, "There are these dreams... Where everything is so overwhelming; so frightening, as if I'm in a world where nothing that is 'fact' really exists."

Urahara sets his cup down on the table, a serious look upon his face, "Karin-chan... I believe I know what is wrong with you; it could be said that nothing is really wrong at all."

"**The man is riiiight, Kurosaki-chaaaaaan~"**

My eyes widen for a moment at the sound of the voice. Where could it be coming from? There are no spirits around pulling pranks on me, I would feel them around me. This is more... Demonic. Definitely no Hollow, but there is a terrifying presence around me everywhere I go. I feel so weak, and yet... I feel as if a power has been bestowed upon me that I cannot yet grasp.

"By the looks of it, you have about four days before you reach your total breaking point," Urahara sighed, "Man, I wish you'd of come to me sooner... I give you three days."

"Three days to...?"

A sly smile formed on his face; he knows something... And he isn't telling me.

"I give you three days to connect fully with that voice before you completely lose go insane."

I'll go... Insane? Could the really become so strong that I lose my mind...

This is all so unbelievable.

**"I hope you reach me in time... Kurosaki-chan..." **

What was that...? I could barely hear it that time... The voice sounded to small, so far away...

Why does this feel so much worse that when it was right behind me?


	4. The First Day

AN:

A key:

**bold: **The voice only Karin can hear

_**bold and italic: **_Karin's dreams/anything not happening in "reality"

Normal: her average thoughts and actions

Nope, don't own bleach. Tite Kubo does, though~

* * *

What is a person to do with three days, no advice, and an eerie feeling that something horrible is about to happen? If anyone has the answer, I would very much like to know, because, frankly, I haven't got a damn clue as to what Urahara expects me to do. "I give you three days," he says, and shoo's me away. It's as if a harsh, cruel plot has been laid out for the world to see me fail...

This task that laid ahead was something I had never once imagined happening to myself. After all, Ichigo was always the on who had these strange things happening to him. He's got his normal life back now, and it seems that the more average things get for him, the more hectic my life gets. It's as if every unnatural event that he was supposed to go through was now being handed down to me. A passing of the torch from brother to sister.

"Come on..." I groaned, laying in my bed. "Say something, already..."

The voice hadn't spoken once to me since the incident at Urahara's shop. The very last thing it told me was, "I hope you reach me in time... Kurosaki-chan..."

What I had become accustomed to was a raspy, yet undeniably clear and terrifying voice, and yet... In that instance, it had shriveled into something less than that. As if the very thing that and placed into me so much fear had in turn found something to haunt it's dark nights. It should have been a relief, not having the indirectly frighting comments running through my head each passing moment. I should have felt somewhat of a release or freedom. Yet, in place of that, I felt more alone than I ever had in my life.

The night mom died was the most utterly painful night of my life. The night Ichigo saved Yuzu and I from that first Hollow was more terrifying than anything I'd felt before. The image of that poor, lost soul trapped inside that parakeet begging to see his lost loved one had haunted me for weeks after Ichigo saved him. All of these things were overshadowed by the feeling that burned inside me now.

I both wanted to scream, and I wanted to hide. I begged for even one chance to hear the voice, to know it still existed inside of me. It was like every feeling I had felt before my meeting with Urahara was reversed, flipped around, and transformed from straight fear into a mixture of pain and loss.

Never once in the seventeen months since my brother lost his powers have I wanted for him to get them back. As I told Urahara a while back, Ichigo has spent his life protecting us and it's my time to return the favor. Over this past day, I've wished for nothing more than Ichigo to run out of the house and regain his powers.

I allowed my eyes to close, and figured that I'd merely wasted away doing nothing. I had to be doing something wrong, right? There had to be something I was missing within the silence of mine and Yuzu's shared bedroom. If only I could figure out what was different, I might be able to fix everything and feel at least some for of normality return to my life.

"One more dream, Voice..." I muttered quietly, allowing myself to slowly drift into slumber. "One more nightmare, and this time... No interruptions."

* * *

AN:

It's still such a short chapter, I'm so sorry! This is probably the shortest one of all... Next one will be longer, though. I've already started writing it and it's already was longer than all of these so far.

Also, I'm sorry it's taken me so long to update. I've been dealing with a lot of school stuff, and finals are coming up so I'll try to update a bit faster once school lets out. I'll probably post one more update this weekend as well.


	5. The Realization

AN:

This chapter will take place in Karin's dreams, so instead of using the key I've posted on every other chapter, just know that none of this is happening in "real life".

Nope, don't own bleach. Tite Kubo does, though~

* * *

I expected to see the same vast, empty darkness that had always surrounded me before. For, that is what I had come accustomed to; darkness engulfing me, allowing me no sight into any specific qualities of my surroundings. What I saw as I blinked open my eyes, though, was nothing of the sort. It seemed to be a child's playroom; only lit by the flicker of candles and more playfully demonic, as opposed to just playful. The floor was checkered tile and a ridiculous amount of strange toys were piled up and strewn all over.

"You came!" A childish voice squealed from the corner of the room, "Karin-chan~"

Turning quickly, I saw a small person staring up at me; he looked to be no older than a toddler, and stared at me with eyes full of undeniable glee. In many ways, he looks highly out of place in this frightening playroom, and in others he fit right in; as if this was meant to be his home, yet he refused to completely move into it. I imagined that he was some sort of a reluctantly permanent feature to the room.

"Karin-chan~" He yelled again, flailing about in a frenzy, "You came, you came, you came!"

"Who are you...?" I asked in hushed tones, unsure whether this innocent child that played before me was the holder of the nightmarish voice that haunted my nights. It seemed almost too impossible of a though, but in retrospect, when had my life ever been made of things purely seen in the realm of the possible?

"Karin-chan~ I can't tell you that!" Said the child, showing the signs of the beginning stages of a temper tantrum. "Think, think, think! Karin-chan! You know who I am! You have to know!"

Wracking my brain, I began to feel queasy and very unsettled. There was something wrong here, something was very bad about this place. It wasn't safe here, and yet, as always my feelings were fraught with conflict. Unsafe, and yet... This room felt perfectly suited for me. Even the strange child that stood before me seemed to set my mind somewhat at ease; that being said, he also terrified me. The way he smiled at first filled me with such hope, but once his attitude had changed into something less than pleasant, I felt as if the room was shrinking. The air was, in a literal sense, too thick to breath.

I had to wake up. This torture couldn't last any longer, no matter how dire the consequences would be if I couldn't figure out the child's identity. I collapsed onto the tiled floor of the room, screamed, and waited for someone to wake me up.

This virtue was not granted to me, though, as the child quickly clamped his hands over my mouth and urged me to be quiet. He looked angry, sad, and even somewhat disappointed. I allowed myself a moment of thought to realize that maybe, out of the two of us, he needed to be saved the most.

"Karin-chan~ needs to calm down!" He cried out,looking at me then glancing over to a pile of stuffed animals, "I would never harm Karin-chan! She know that! She's just... She's just being silly!"

Watching the boy act in such a way, as if I wasn't even here anymore, filled me with anguish.

Only one thing was clear to me now.

This child needed me, and I needed him


End file.
